Miscarriage can be a deeply personal and emotionally challenging experience, profoundly affecting mothers and fathers alike. It is estimated that between 10-20 percent of known pregnancies end in miscarriage, making it an unfortunately common occurrence for many expectant parents.
As a mother whose first pregnancy experience ended in miscarriage, I’m honored to share with you about the various feelings and emotions you might experience after a miscarriage, as well as how these reactions can manifest and evolve over time.
Understanding the Emotional Impact of Miscarriage
Miscarriage often leaves parents feeling complex emotions. Miscarriage has caused parents to feel everything from heartbreak to relief, and deep shame to profound connection with others. From grief and sadness to guilt and anger, the feelings experienced after a miscarriage can be overwhelming and may take time to process.
Grieving the Loss
Coping with a miscarriage can be difficult and varies from person to person. Some may feel overwhelming sorrow and hopelessness, while others might be detached or emotionless. My first miscarriage occurred on the heels of a separate grief journey, which equipped my heart to navigate loss without spiraling out of control.
Each person’s history is unique, and while one parent may experience deep depression following a miscarriage another may shrug their shoulders and trudge on. Regardless, giving yourself time to mourn is essential. I highly encourage reaching out to friends, family, or a therapist for help.
Coping with Guilt and Self-Blame
Numerous people who go through a miscarriage might feel a sense of guilt or hold themselves responsible for the loss. It is crucial to remember that a miscarriage is not typically a result of something the mother did or didn't do. Reaching out for help and talking to a mental health expert can be beneficial in dealing with these emotions and progressing in life. You can find our free guide to no-cost resources HERE.
Managing Anxiety and Fear
After experiencing a miscarriage, we parents often feel anxious and fearful about future pregnancies. These feelings are completely normal and can be managed through self-care practices such as exercise, prayer, meditation, seeking community, and therapy. Speaking with a healthcare provider about any concerns and developing a plan for future pregnancies is key.
How to Remember Your Loss
Create a Memorial
Consider creating a memorial dedicated to your loved little one. This could be a physical space in your home, a tree planted in their honor, a garden, or a piece of art that honors their memory.
Write in a Journal
Journaling about your loved one can help you express your feelings and emotions. You could write about your memories, your thoughts, or anything else that comes to mind.
Participate in a Cause
Consider participating in a cause that honors pregnancy and infant loss. This could be volunteering at a charity, donating to a cause, or participating in a walk or run that honors your child’s memory.
Though no easy task, try to celebrate and cherish the brief time your child lived. You could plan a memorial gathering with friends and family, share stories and memories, or create a photo album or scrapbook.
Keeping a reminder of your loved little one can provide a deep sense of comfort and of closeness. This could be a piece of jewelry, a stuffed animal, or something else that reminds you of them.
The Bottom Line
In conclusion, the emotional impact of miscarriage is complex and difficult to navigate. It's important to allow yourself time to grieve and seek support from loved ones or a mental health professional as needed. Remember that healing is possible, and resources are available to support you through this difficult time.
MyJuly27 understands the importance of honoring these precious lives by artistically rendering their footprints. We know that every story of loss is different, whether it be due to a miscarriage, stillbirth, abortion, or a young child gone too soon. If you're looking for an infant loss keepsake, we invite you to browse our selection of products. We hope our offerings will help you cherish memories of your little one and keep their memory alive in your heart and in your community.
-The Team at MyJuly27